Friday, January 8, 2010
Helping Me Focus
This face keeps me going! This sweet, innocent face makes anything that happens during the day not such a big deal. Anytime I feel overwhelmed or anxious I step back and look at my daughter. I quietly thank God for this joy He has brought to my life and ask him to help me keep her my focus. Too many nights I have gone to bed wondering if I spent enough time enjoying my little one. Every morning I ask God to help me not to worry about the laundry, dishwasher full of dishes waiting to be put away, the vacuuming or the dusting. I love to have a clean house and I take great pride in it, but my baby will only be a baby for a blink of an eye and I don't want to miss anything. Why be a stay-at-home Mom if you aren't going to make the BEST of each and every day with your child? Lula Mae won't be my baby for too much longer. In just a few short months she will be a big sister and I am having trouble emotionally with that. I have tons of questions running through my head each and every day and all I can do is give them to God! Will she hate me for having another baby? Will she hate the baby? Will she stop being this joyful ball of energy once the baby comes? Can I love another baby the way that I love Lula Mae? How can I give each one of them individual attention? Are we ready to have 2 kids financially? Are we ready to have 2 kids emotionally? I know that these are all things that I don't need to worry about, but it is very hard not to some days. All I have to do is look at Lula Mae's face and I know that God is going to take care of it all! Lula Mae has really made me a better person and she helps me grow everyday!