Wednesday, May 22, 2013

THE Question

There is one question that I get more than others....

"How are you gonna do that?"

My first reaction, which I bite my tongue and don't say out loud, is "well I am going to push this baby out just like my other kids, hopefully". But that is rude, and I don't say that. Plus I know thats not what they really mean anyway.... or at least I hope that is not what they actually mean....  

I know they really mean "How are you gonna hand over this baby?".

I guess they are expecting some long drawn out answer where I cry and and tell them I don't know. They always look confused by my answer.

I tell them I am not going to do it at all, God is. I tell them I am going to take it one day at a time, and pray every second of the way.

They also look at me crazy when I tell them this pregnancy is different than my others were. I have different feelings, different emotions, different everything. Don't get me wrong, I love her and feel connected to her, but it's so different. I truly believe God prepared me emotionally for this journey long before He even brought the desire to my heart.

I can't wait to deliver this baby. It will be wonderful and amazing and so incredibly special! I am more excited to see Esther and Scott hold their little girl for the first time! It will be a moment I treasure forever!

So how am I gonna do it? Only by the grace of God, joyfully and for God's glory! 

Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for God's glory. 
 -1 Corinthians 10:31

When that day comes, yes I may have hormonal emotions to sort out, but I know my God is more than capable of dealing with those. I just feel so much peace and so much joy that I can't think to make myself look at delivery day any other way.

By God's grace I met this couple. By God's grace I am carrying this baby. By God's grace He is using me to bring this baby into the world healthy and safe. By God's grace this journey will have a beautiful ending!

Esther and Scott are being blessed with a baby through this journey, but the blessing I am getting is multiplied by a million!

Sunday, May 5, 2013

My Boy Is Three

Somehow it just does not seem possible that my little guy is three years old today. Where has time gone? This kid has taught us so much, and brings so much excitement to our lives! God really knew what He was doing bringing him into our lives three years ago. As soon as I saw him he seemed so small, even though he was bigger than his sister at birth. I have not stopped feeling that way yet. He is my tiny little man, but his spirit is enormous!

 My oh my, how he has changed.... and yet he is still my tiny little guy! His allergies are still a struggle and his skin has more bad days than good, but he is making improvements and that is wonderful! He is learning how to deal with a lot of these issues too, and that is making it easier on us. He is able to tell us when he needs medicine and things like that. Here are a few stats about Jayce...

Height: 34 inches
Weight: 25.6 lbs 
Favorite foods: bananas, cheese, avocados and anything sweet! 
Favorite books: The Bible, Berenstain Bears books, David and Goliath, Goodnight Moon... and lots more! He is quite a book lover now! 
Favorite toys: His drums (he is a natural people!) cars and trucks, rocks and his "sling" (to play David and Goliath of course) dice, Roger (his space ship... that he named Roger) 
Favorite color: blue and green (he only tells me 800 times a day.... so yeah, I'm sure about this one!) 

He loves to wear his pajamas... and chance he gets he asks to put them back on. 
He loves to watch his David and Goliath DVD.... he would watch it over and over if we let him. 
He loves to sing, mostly worship songs. He sings almost all day long, non stop. He is mu musical child for sure! 
He gets his feelings hurt very easily and wears his heart on his sleeve. He is a sensitive little man!
He still has deep eyes, like those of an old man who has seen so much. 
He adores his big sister and always wants to spend more time with her than she does with him. 
He looks up to his Daddy and loves him so much! 
He loves to be outside. 
He is very serious.... but when he is in a silly mood, his laugh and smile are precious! 
He is not a fan of yucky smells.... the chickens and the farm were a no-go in his book. 
He loves to come up and just give you a big hug and say he loves you. 

He is amazing and I just love him so much! I look back at how tough things have been with him, and yet I still fill with joy thinking about it all. God made him PERFECTLY and I am focusing on seeing my kids through His eyes, not mine. I am excited to see Jayce grow and learn more about the Lord. I know God has a great plan for his life! I don't know why God picked me to be the Mommy of this amazing little guy, but I sure am thankful! 

Happy birthday sweet Jayce! You are three, can you believe it? I wonder what adventures this next year has in store for you?