Saturday, August 22, 2009

My Struggle

I have the future weighing heavy on my mind these days. This is something that I know I shouldn't worry about, but again, my mind is getting in the way of my heart. Charlie and I are going to have some things coming up that will be challenging. They will be challenging mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Luckily, Charlie and I have a very strong relationship and I know that together we can get through anything! I am blessed to have such an amazing husband! It is hard for me to wrap my mind around what is up ahead, but I am trying desperately. I get very frustrated with myself when I worry about things that I can't even change or control. This has been a problem I have had all of my life really. I am a very OCD person and I love to have control (anyone who know me well is quite aware of this). Well, sometimes we are not suppose to have control, and I am trying to grasp this concept. I have a lot to pray about right now concerning the future. I am hoping that with time and prayer I will trust God deeper and deeper with this.

Therefor do not worry about tomorrow,
for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:34

I read this verse every morning. It helps me give God my worry. Why is it so easy to tell someone else "If it is meant to happen, its going to happen" and "You are just suppose to trust Him" and "Don't worry He will take care of you", but so hard to live by yourself? Again, this is just something I am trying to work on in myself.

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