Saturday, April 10, 2010

Terrible Two's?

Almost 2...

Honestly, I don't believe in "terrible two's". After taking tons of early childhood development classes I guess I just look at things with children a lot differently than most parents. Around the age of two children have a huge burst of brain development. They want more stimulation, (hints the neediness of children who before were very independent) they want more responsibility, (hints why the try so hard to help, even though it comes out much less helpful) they want different boundaries, (hints them testing the limits they were so nicely obeying before... they just want to see if they can get past them now) they just want MORE! They are not trying to be defiant (even though we parents could bet money that they are!). They are just trying to grow and change and learn. Unfortunately their little brains, although they are developing, can't express their emotions well. As parents we have to teach our children how to deal with their emotions from a very young age. I think that most parents give up when their toddler hits this very tough period and just give in to all the fits and tantrums just to make the child "happy". Well, making them "happy" means that you better be ready to make them "happy" at their every whim. Have fun with that for the next 16 years! Kids learn quick. If you give in once because they are screaming and being uncontrollable, they will know that the next time you say "no" they just have to recreate that same behavior to get what they want. "If it worked before maybe it will work now" is what is going through their brain. Sadly, the are probably right. Not me.... sorry Lula Mae. Lula Mae has just hit this phase and I tell myself every morning "I am the parent, I am stronger, I am smarter and I know what is best for my child. No means no... not maybe". I hate having to pop my little girl and I hate having to put her in time out. Honestly, I would hate for her to turn out like most kids (whiny, demanding, disobedient and rude). That's what I would hate WAY more than time outs and popping! The Bible says you are to train up a child in the way that he should go... not the way that he would go! It takes strength to deal with some of Lula Mae's mood swings, but I know we can get through it. I know that if we are consistent with our rules and discipline we will be happy with the results. Right now, its tough. I want to give in just so I don't go bald... but I can't, and I won't. That would not be fair to Lula Mae. I want the best for her, and I want her to be prepared for life. So, I may go to bed crying and with a very heavy heart because the day has been very trying, but it is worth it. "This too shall pass", right? I do a lot of praying these days, and I really think that is all that will get me through this. I turn to the Bible to give me strength. Luckily, the Bible is quite encouraging when it comes to how my husband and I parent (especially discipline)...

Discipline the child in whom you delight (Proverbs 3:21)

Discipline while there is hope (Proverbs 19:18)

Discipline diligently the child you love (Proverbs 13:24)

Discipline a child in the way he should go (Proverbs 22:6)

Discipline foolishness out of your child's heart (Proverbs 22:15)

Discipline evil out of your child's heart (Proverbs 20:30)

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly (Proverbs 13:24)

Do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4)

These verses make me realize that it is my motherly duty to God to get through the "terrible two's". To glorify God I have to parent the way that He wants me to. I am so thankful to have a God who helps me parent by giving me wonderful advice and guidance! I hope that some of you other Mom's out there will study these verses, pray over them, and allow them to help you get through whatever "phase" you children are in. Happy Sunday everyone!

1 comment:

Heather said...

We see the difference in Lula Mae all the time with the way you parent! Don't get discouraged you are doing exactly what God commands.