Crashing Like The Waves

This post may hurt your feelings, make you feel uncomfortable or make you mad. I'm sorry in advance. Just read it to the very end and you may feel differently.



I went to see a friend of mine in the hospital and meet her new baby boy. I was excited..... and not excited at the same time.

I found out that a friends was expecting yesterday. I was excited..... and not excited at the same time.

I saw some belly pictures of an old friend of mine on Facebook who is documenting her growth. I was excited.... and not excited at the same time.

A friend of mine posted that she was having another girl on her Facebook. I was excited.... and not excited at the same time.

I read a comment on Facebook the other day of a young mom who was jokingly complaining about her kids. I thought it was a little funny..... but not after about 2 seconds of thought.

I saw a lady standing beside a building, obviously pregnant, and smoking a cigarette. I was discussed.... and then I was overcome with anger.

My emotions go back and forth, back and forth. I feel like a wave crashing on the beach and then washing back out again.

I want nothing more that to have my best friend call me and scream the words "I'm pregnant!" into my ear. I want nothing more than to look on Facebook and see her belly album.... to see her positive pregnancy test.... to hear her say "It's a ______!".... to see her husband touch her belly and light up when the baby moves.... to have her call me and ask me all kinds of crazy pregnancy questions..... to have her text me at 2 am because she thinks it's "time".... to see her holding her baby in the hospital..... to see her husband hold his child..... to get to hold their sweet baby and spoil it like they spoil mine........... I have faith that it will happen. God is in control and He is faithful.

I can do nothing. I feel like I can do less than nothing actually. I can't even be a true source of comfort for her, because I am not walking in her shoes. There are times when I can't tell if what I am saying helps or hurts. Like this post.... it may help.... it may hurt. If she tells me to delete it, I will. But maybe she won't. I take for granted how blessed I am to be able to so easily conceive. My fertility is not the first thing I think about when I wake up, and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. But for my best friend, it is.

She is so much stronger than me. So much that I can't even explain it to you. She humbles me and keeps my faith strong. She has smiled through this entire process, and I know she will continue to. That does not mean she hasn't had tough days. Regardless, she is faithful. She trusts God fully and is leaning on Him.

God is doing amazing things in her life, and her husbands life. I can't wait to see what God has in store for their family.

I pray for them, without ceasing. Won't you pray for them too? Pray for peace, understanding, compassion and patience. Pray that God brings their family home soon. Pray for their hearts to be strong and focused on Him. Just simply pray.

Cherish Them

There are times when I realize Lula Mae is not a baby anymore. This morning, it hit me pretty hard and come out of nowhere. I just looked at her and realized how much she has changed over the past few months, physically and mentally. I just stopped and held her. I kissed her and rocked her. I listened to her little voice. I studied her delicate features that are still just as perfect as they were the day she was born. I told her just how much I loved her. Every ounce of me loves my children. Half of me is thrilled to see them grow, but the other half just wants them to stay little forever. Life is so short. With the holidays, things get crazy and time really passes quickly and moments with my kids just seem to be rushed or looked over. I am so glad the holidays have passed because I am ready for time to slow down a bit so I can enjoy my babies. I want to cherish every moment with them.... the good, the bad and the in between.

Put that laundry on hold and go play with your kids! Your house may be a disaster from the holidays, but that is just fine! Nothing is more precious than the time you spend with you kids. Happy Wednesday everyone!

Happy Birthday Jesus!

Merry Christmas everyone!

I hope you are all celebrating the birth of our savior and enjoying your family!

Google Image

Sneak Peak

You can't tell much from this picture, but our house needs some TLC (paint the shutters, work on the yard, ect.). Although, we won't be in a super huge rush once we move in. We are super excited to be able to say ..... this is our house!!!! The hard part is over. Now we just wait for moving day!!!! January 1st will be a fun, busy day!!!! I can't wait to be able to show all of you the inside. The before and after pictures will be fun to do. The house is incredibly clean and very well taken care of, but we have a good bit of..... decorating to do. I won't say much. I will let the before picture speak for themselves ;-)

Today Is The Day!

We are closing on our new house today!
So, as you may imagine, my brain is in a puddle....
somewhere among the boxes....
I am numb with disbelief.
I am overwhelmed.
I am exhausted.
I am excited.
I am grateful.
I am nervous.
I am joyful.

I am......
hoping my brain turns up soon because I miss it.

Time Warp

This post is for everyone who has ever said....

"Jayce looks just like his Daddy!"

Sorry folks, but this boy looks like his Momma! A lot! This is only one of the many pictures that shows just how much he looks like me. Yep, that is a picture of me on the left. Looks like Jayce, huh? I guess I can see why everyone though I was a boy when I was a baby. I did look like a boy.

Letters Of Intent

Dear Office Max,

You have sealed your fate. Never again will I order ANYTHING from you. Ever. When I email you concerning a package that has not yet shipped and you send me this:

Dear Amy,

We apologize for the inconvenience you have encountered with the delivery of your merchandise. We have contacted the distribution center who is working with the carrier to ensure prompt delivery. Please allow 24-48 business hours to be contacted via phone.

Once again we do apologize. OfficeMax thanks you for the opportunity of servicing your future business and personal supply needs. If we can be of further assistance please do not hesitate to contact us.

Thank you for choosing OfficeMax!

I'm not to upset. But then no one contacted me.... so I contacted you again. Then you sent me this:

Hello I show notes in your order that you got a email on 12/14/10 letting you know that we could not locate your package and have been issued credit under the credit memo number
3483917, I also show that the credit has been issued back to you already as well.

Fist off you NEVER contacted me so lets don't lie, okay? Oh and where did the "Dear Amy" go? How about the "we apologize...." junk? Huh? Where did that customer service go? Now here is the issue.... there has not been a credit issued like you are saying. Don't tell me you have, when you haven't. Don't mess with my money. Also, I tracked the 3 separate attempts to ship the package to me. One of them was "delivered to the front door at 5:55pm"... in Panama City Florida. Yeah, that was your bad..... not mine. I checked and re-checked my shipping and billing information. So I suggest you issue my refund so that I can go and spend my money elsewhere. I hope you are ready for the phone call I will be making tomorrow. It's gonna be great!

Sincerely,

Royally Ticked!

The Race Is On!

Jayce

is

mobile!

People, my life just got interesting! Yes, Jayce is scooting....all over the place! He is 7 months old and on the move! You must know that Lula Mae was 9 months old when she finally started scooting. He has her beat with physical development (not that I am comparing them.... simply noticing is all) I feel like I just brought him home, how in the world is he already mobile? *sigh*




Just for fun, lets just add up a few factors in my life at this moment, shall we....


We are closing on our new house in 7 days (Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!)

Christmas is in 11 days (WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!!)

We are moving into our new house in 13 days (DOUBLE Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!)

2011 is kicking off in 18 days (SLOW DOWN PLEASE!!!!!!!!!)

January is the biggest month for our family when it comes to birthdays (including mine!!!)

I have 5 months to get all the details of our Disney trip squared away (Triple Ahhhhhhh!)


Not to mention that in the midst of all that life is still happening. Laundry needs to be done, meals have to be fixed, things have to be cleaned, kids need to be cared for, bills have to be paid, somewhere in there I need to sleep and did I mention I have only packed like 6 boxes so far...... So pretty soon I will be on a bit of a hiatus. I won't be gone, just on a bit of a vacation. Well, a vacation minus the relaxation, yummy food, sunny weather.... okay so nothing like a vacation! I am counting on all of you to keep me company through your fantastic posts. I promise that after all this moving business I will get back into leaving you all some warm and fuzzy comment love! Just bare with me through the next couple of weeks! It's gonna be a wild ride!

Cold

It was one of those days where I was cold all day long. No matter what I just couldn't get warm. When the words "I am so cold!" came out of my mouth, I realized...

The people who can't pay their power bill or gas bill are cold....

The people who can't afford to fix their broken windows, broken doors, caved in roofs and cracked walls are cold....

The people who live in their car are cold....

The people who carry all of their belongings around on their back and have no home are cold....

The children who are home alone while their parents are out all night and can't operate the thermostat, find a blanket or a warm pair of pajamas are cold...

The children whose parents haven't gotten them a coat this year, and probably can't or won't, are cold....

Suddenly, being in my 69 degree house, wearing pants and a sweatshirt, snuggling under a blanket..... I am not so cold. Not even the slightest bit. My heart is humbled and I am thankful. I pray that I never take something as simple as warmth for granted.

Snuggle Time

It isn't often that Lula Mae wants to cuddle. Even as a tiny baby she wasn't into it. Well these days she has a new obsession. She wants to sit on my lap and watch this...

She just stares at it and smiles. She will randomly say things like, "Mommy I love this song because it's my favorite", "Mommy we sing that at church", "Remember Mommy, remember that part?". She loves to sing the chorus of the song and loves for me to point to the words as we sing together. It is beyond precious and melts my heart. My child is not perfect, she frustrates me from time to time, she causes me to worry about silly things, she was born a broken and sinful person.... but moments like this show me that God is working on her heart and all the work Charlie and I are putting into her is worth it. It is worth every single second.

So Here It Is....

Lula Mae's cow ornament, bell and all!
Although this picture doesn't show the lovely utters. It also doesn't show you just how BIG this ornament is! It is one of the biggest on our tree for sure. Lula Mae loves her some animals!

Letters Of Intent

I am SO glad it is Friday! Charlie has a 3 day weekend and we are very much looking forward to it! I hope you all have a nice relaxing weekend ahead of you. I know from now until after the move we are a pretty busy bunch of folks! Not too busy for Letters Of Intent which is hosted by the wonderful Julie. Be sure to check out her blog for more great letters!



To Everyone Who Wanted The Weather To Change,

See what you did? I hope you're happy.... I sure am not!!!! I was just fine with the hot weather, just fine. Hot weather, although annoying, does not hurt the way cold weather does. I don't want to hear any of you complain about how cold it is this winter. Not one bit! You asked for it!

Signed,

Fr-fr-fr-fr-fr-freezing!!!

********************************************************

Dear Office Max,

I ordered it on November 25th.... IT'S DECEMBER 10th!!!!!! Seriously!!!! Ship it already!!!!! Excuse me while I make a mental note never to buy anything from you, no matter how good of a deal it is. Aaaaaannnnnnd done.

Sincerely,

Impatiently Waiting For My Amazing Deal

********************************************************

To A Company Who Shall Remain Nameless,

I know what my coverage is. I know it very well actually. I know you are just trying to wiggle your way out of paying it. I love how nice you are on the phone, making it seem like it is the doctor offices fault. Well now I look like a goof because I told them what you said.... and you were wrong, very very wrong..... again. Stop making my look stupid and just pay it. Our last conversation was about as nice as I'm going to get, which should make you shiver. I don't like getting blunt and rude, but when it comes to you paying what you are required to pay..... I find it necessary. The date of service was October 2, 2009. Over a year ago! Lets just get this paid so we can move on with our lives, okay? Mmmmkay great!

Signed,

Very Annoyed Customer Who Refuses To Pay What YOU Owe

What Is To Come?

It is hard to believe that 2010 is almost over and that we will soon be ringing in a new year. What does that mean for you? Another year of resolutions that are written with best of intentions and slowly forgotten by Feburary? Another year of trying to break bad habits only to hit Thanksgiving and realize all you have broken is a few fingernails along the way? I hope not. I hope that each one of you will make resolutions (very realistic ones) and work towards them. I am a firm believer that if you have goals, both big and small, you accomplish so much more. However, goals should never be unrealistic. Now I am not saying you shouldn't dream big and reach for the starts. You should. Just realize if you are unable to reach that particular goal it is fine. Look back and see the progress you have made towards that goal and be happy with that. Let that motivate you to keep trying. Also, don't let your goals for yourself get in the way of God's plan for you. Be willing to make adjustments when you feel like He is leading you in a different direction. He always knows best, so try your hardest to listen! I suggest not having too many resolutions. Remember, less is more! Also, I like having a few resolutions that are actually measurable (for example... save money, organize something, read x number of books...) I think it helps to be able to say "Yes, I really did that". You can't always do that with some goals (like find time for myself, eat less junk food, stick to a routine....). Overall I would say just have fun with it! Go back and read this post about making your resolutions list appealing. I used this method and it worked great for me! I am going to be posting my resolutions for 2011 on January 1st and I hope you all will do the same! I would love to check out your resolutions!

Before we stay up way past our bedtime, say happy new Year and kiss the one we love though, we must celebrate the birth of a really swell guy. You may know Him.... His name is Jesus!!!!! So, off you go to enjoy this very quickly passing holiday season! Just so you are aware, we set to close on our house in 12 days!!!!!! Ahhhhh!!!! The lady wants to possibly move that up if we can!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! THAT'S PRETTY EXCITING!!!! Sorry for the yelling. Anyhoo, that means we are 18 days away from our move!!!!!! So please excuse me if I am not pouring out the comment love these days. Just know that I am keeping up with all of you and can't wait to get back into the blogging routine *sigh* as soon as we get settled into the new house!!!! It is going to be great!!!!

Strawberry Lemonade Cake

I mentioned on my Facebook that I had some strawberry lemonade cupcakes to make for our small group and I had a few people interested in the recipe. So instead of messaging each person the recipe, I figured I would just share it here. Who knows, you may try this and love it too! We sure do! It is our second favorite cake around here (a close runner up behind my scratch made red velvet cake). Now I have to say, when I am baking for my sweet kiddos, I keep it healthy.... not so much for me and the hubster though. So, if you are looking for a healthy recipe... I am sorry, but this is not it. I hope you still give it a try though because it is super yummy!

Ingredients For Cake

• 1 strawberry cake mix ( I take the help from the store on this one)
• 1 packet of kool-aid lemonade
  
• 1 can of lemon pie filling (you won't be using the entire can)

Ingredients For Icing (I got this from a friend)

• 1 cup of Crisco (plain or butter flavor)
• 1 cup of butter (2 sticks)
• 1 bag of powdered sugar (not an exact measurement because you will add a little at a time but it is usually about half of a 2 pound bag... so about a pound of it.)
  
• Vanilla extract (to taste... usually not much at all)
• 1 packet of strawberry lemonade kool-aid (you only need to use a little less than half of it)
  

Instructions For Icing

• Let butter set out and get to room temperature.
• Cream together the butter and Crisco
• Slowly add in the powdered sugar a little at a time
• After adding a little bit of sugar add in half, or a little less than half, of the strawberry lemonade kool-aid packet
• Add more sugar until it gets to a firm consistency.
• Store in the fridge
  

*If you are not into making it yourself you can just get 2 containers of butter cream icing and add the strawberry lemonade kool-aid to that (still only use half the packet, or a little less)


Instructions For Cake

• Read the back of your cake mix box. Pre-heat the oven and prep your pans as directed.
  
• Mix the cake batter as directed. Add the packet of lemonade kool-aid to the batter.
  
• Pour batter into your pans and bake as directed. I usually under bake from what the package suggests by 2 minutes and test each cake to see if they are done. No one likes an over cooked, dry cake.
• Let cakes cool completely before assembling and icing your cake.
  
• Once cool, spread a layer of pie filling on one of the cakes. Now stack the other cake on top of that one.
  
• Ice your cake.
  
• Cut yourself a slice and enjoy!

It is super easy to make these into cupcakes as well. I like this recipe both ways! Enjoy!

Family Tradition

You were expecting Hank Williams Jr., weren't you? Well sorry to disappoint you but this seriously is about one of our family traditions.... so please continue....

Okay, it was a family tradition. All year long we fill up our jar with pocket change. Then, we cash it in to buy our Christmas tree. For the past three years Charlie and I have taken Lula Mae to the local Christmas tree farm to pick out a tree. It is so fun! They have some animals, a fire to roast marshmallows over, hot chocolate and a little ornament shop. We pick ornaments out and write the year on the back of them. This year was the first year Lula Mae got to pick her own ornament. All the pretty little ornaments and what did she pick? A cow. Not a cute cartoonish cow, oh no, a big fat realistic cow... with utters. Yep, a big fat cow. That's my girl. She loves animals. Then she helped me pick Jayce's first ornament, a little bell that says "Babies 1st Christmas" with a snowman on top.

So then we went to look at the trees. We always go back to the "clearance" trees. You know, the ones they hide way in the back because they are cheaper. They are smaller and sometimes have a few gaps in the limbs and such, but that is fine with us. Then it happened.... we saw the price.

WHAT????

You are kidding????

That is almost double what we paid last year... and this one is SMALLER!!!!

And this is when our new tradition was born.

From now on we will be visiting the lovely little tree farm, petting the cute animals, roasting marshmallows, sipping the hot chocolate and letting the kids pick an ornament. Then we will drive 2 miles down the road to Food Lion and get a tree for $29.99.

I'm totally okay with that. Traditions sometimes need to be tweaked, but they are still special. I hope you are all starting to enjoy all those little family traditions of your own!

Monday Mugs

It is Monday, but it feels a whole lot more like Wednesday around here. Poor Daddy has been working, working, working and hasn't had a day off in a while. So this weekend felt nothing like a weekend, and today feels nothing like a Monday (which perhaps isn't a terrible thing). Only because I love Heather from Oswald Cuties am I linking up today for Monday Mugs. It is one of my least favorite themes, but I will run with it. If nothing else you will all get a good laugh, right? This weeks theme is....

Self Portrait


I tend to photograph terribly... because I make crazy faces...

Like this... my excited face....

I also have a habit of making it EXTREMELY obvious that my left ear is noticeably bigger than my right but wearing my hair up ...

If that isn't the case I somehow distort my body and make myself look 4 times wider than I really am....


Or I smile all crazy and show my horribly yellow teeth to the world...


Then, of course, I take pictures like this where you can see up my nose.... because we all know how attractive that is....

A lot of the time I get caught mid sentence and look like a goof.....

yeah, that happens a lot.... oh, and might I add that my hubby changed THIS to my profile picture on Facebook... if you feel the need to leave him some hate mail comments, I totally understand.

What happens when you get an awesome photographer for your bridal portraits????

You get a picture that looks beautiful, but nothing like you really.

And there you have it. My self portraits. I hope all you folks who wanted to see pictures of me feel fulfilled now (insert sarcasm and laughter here). I am totally ok with the fact that I am anything but photogenic. Happy Monday bloggy buddies! Have a great week!

7 Months And Counting!

Someone is growing up way too fast. My handsome little guy is 7 months old today. Why does 7 months sound so much older than 6 months? For me, I think it is the fact that he is closer to the one year mark than the newborn phase. Jayce is such a cuddle bug and I am soaking it all in. Lula Mae was so not a cuddly baby so I am excited to have a snuggle buddy! So, what is up with Jayce these days?

• Still no teeth, but it looks like his bottom ones are about to make their appearance
• He can't crawl yet, but he can roll and scoot anywhere he wants to go. He is going to be crawling before we know it!
  
• He has no interest in eating food yet. I try cereal and applesauce every now and then but he just could not care less. That's just fine though, he is growing beautifully (16 pounds roughly) and drinks his bottles just fine.
  
• He loves to laugh and play with his big sister. He is also very in love with his Daddy and playing rough. He is such a boy!
  
• We can already see that this little man has a BIG temper. When you take something away from him or he doesn't get exactly what he wants.... look out. He needs to have a chat with Lula Mae and see how well that attitude works in this house.
  
• He is starting to do much, much better in the car! I am not dreading the drive to Orlando quite as much as I was.
  
• He is quite the talker! He loves to babble and sing which it one of the most amazing sounds ever. I love his sweet baby voice!
• His reflux seems to be very controlled. We are looking forward to being able to wean him from his medicine and enjoy a reflux free baby.
  
• He is loving "Your Baby Can Read" just like his sister. When his video is on he is so amazed and enthralled. It may just be a few more months before he starts reading, but I am not expecting that.... just saying. Lula Mae was reading her first words at 8 and a half months. We shall see :-)

As exciting as it is to see Jayce grow and change, I hope time slows down a little bit. I am trying so hard to soak in all these sweet moments, but I feel like they are slipping away at lightning speed! Happy 7 months Jayce, you are such a gift from God and I love you so very much!

200 Challenge Update

I haven't done a 200 Challenge in forever. I figured at this point I shouldn't try to back track and breakdown each month, but I thought giving you my overall totals would be a good idea.

August $204.53

September $197.52

October $193.48

November $208.69

Are wondering what The 200 Challenge is? Well then you haven't been reading my blog long enough now have you... shame on you! No, I'm kidding! A friend of mine and fellow blogger started a grocery challenge at the beginning of this year to try and see if she could spend $200 or less each month. I joined in, since I am always in for saving money! All in all I have done well and really enjoyed this challenge. I will be continuing to use this budget in 2011. It has really saved us a lot and I am grateful for Sarah putting this challenge together and teaching me how to better budget my finances. Her challenge sparked something major in me. I wanted to do better in all categories, not just groceries. My budget has not been the same (in a good way). In January I will post how much I spent on groceries for the year, along with how much I would have spent had I not joined the challenge. I will let you be the judge of whether is was worth it.